Saturday, May 31, 2008


Up or down?

I’ve been spending the past few minutes visiting blogs. Enjoyed reading Kevin Ng’s blog spot because it gave me much food for thought. You can read his blog post here.

I think I shall do a little round up of this month of May before moving on to other topics. May has been a month of mayhem and madness. We had A level SPAs, which I seriously don’t know how I’d fare. I was depressed for a few days after one of them and I’m happy for the encouragement some of my friends gave to me. It did lift my spirits tremendously.

There were many tests… some were fairly well done, and some… dismal. I know many a time we give the reason that “It’s a class/cohort thing, everyone didn’t do well.” I don’t know, it just doesn’t feel substantial enough to be a reason for sickly grades. Why conform to the standard of others, be someone outstanding, I say. Yes, it’s almost impossible in our competitive world… but we try. Be a non-conformist.


(A friend chided me about this before.
“By becoming a non-conformist, you are actually conforming to being a non-conformist!” I got stunned.)

But, as one of my classmates mentioned, June Common Tests will be our redemption. Hopefully that’d be the case, or we’d just burn in hell a little while more. =)

Teachers. Goshness, some of them are really pissy. I don’t know why some of them have really changed over the course of term 2. Work stress? Unhappiness with the class? Hmm. Lessons have somewhat become mundane and rigid, where’s all the joy in learning gone to…?

Moving on, what’s up with people and acceptance? I think many of us chase this dream… a dream of being accepted, to be in the company of others that you engage with most of the time. Sadly, when we put in so much effort to pursue acceptance, we lose ourselves in the process. We evolve into someone or something that we’re not. Can you actually catch acceptance?

I’m sure we’ve all struggled with this issue before… it’s scary. But I think each of us has our own way of overcoming it. At times, we need to embrace our imperfections to embrace the imperfection of others, don’t we? Okay, I think I’m struggling with that right now, how about you?


“Honor. Dignity. Self-respect.
Although when I think about it, I’ve never had any of those things. I didn’t ask to be born. I’ve always made the wrong decisions --- now I’m letting life decide for me.”

_____________________
Hail Mary.


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Nicolas Yee
21
30 Jan '91
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